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How To Talk Dirty: 11 Tips To Titillate Like A Pro

We get it: Even the best of us can squirm with anxiety at the mere thought of dirty talk (erotic talk).

But it can end up being the hottest thing to escape your lips and lead to deeper sexual arousal!

So, how do you go about talking dirty?
Let’s break it down.

11 Orgasmic Tips On How To Talk Dirty Like A Pro

Did you know 56% of women have sexual fantasies about their S.O. dirty talking to them?

This staggering figure comes from a survey by Justin Lehmiller, PhD, a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute, Indiana University.

It’s clear: People love erotic talk because it’s a fun way to initiate foreplay and keep things steamy under the sheets.

So here are some sex tips on how to talk dirty:

1. Start Slow

Take your time figuring things out, especially if you’ve never explored talking dirty before.

What’s a good place to start?
Moans of pleasure!

It sounds cheesy, but it can come utterly natural in the heat of the moment.

Follow a moan with a phrase like, ‘right there!’ or ‘yess!’. Once you get comfortable with this, you can advance your sexy talk to more descriptive sentences.

A happy couple posing for a picture


2. Talk Dirty to Yourself First

Practice the sexy things you want to say on your own.

We recommend talking dirty out loud when you masturbate to get comfortable with the words. Then, take things to the bedroom.

Remember: Dirty talk isn’t about being vulgar.

It’s more about creating sexual tension and making you and your boyfriend or partner feel good.

3. Work On Your Bedroom Voice

Gradually build intensity on the dirty things you’re about to say to your lover.

You don’t want someone yelling at you ALL CAPS style when you’re trying to feel sexy, right?

Lower your voice, and talk slowly. You can even go up to your significant other’s ear and whisper sexy things.

Hot sex tips:
  • You can practice by sensually reading an erotic novel out loud.
  • For more on dirty talk, check out the book ‘Nice Girl's Guide to Talking Dirty: Ignite Your Sex Life with Naughty Whispers, Hot Fantasies and Screams of Passion’ by Ruth Neustifter.
 Read More: Lack of intimacy got you down? Just Talk It Out With Our Anxiety-Free Tips!

4. Let Your Partner Lead

Does your partner engage in dirty talk?

Then, feel free to take their cues and add to the commentary.

But keep your statements or questions simple, like ‘yess, your [insert body part] makes me feel [insert appropriate descriptive word].’

Always remember that there’s no wrong thing to say during dirty talk — anything sexy goes!

5. Make Eye Contact

Lock eyes with each other while dirty talking.

It can speak volumes and send your partner over the edge!

But make sure you’re not staring. You want to emulate confidence — not challenge your partner to a stare-down!

So take a deep breath, gaze into their eyes, and relax before having a sex talk.

A couple embracing in bed


6. Want Something? Ask For It

Got the greatest fantasy all worked out in your head?
Then, it’s time to put it into action!

Start by revealing what you want.

It could be as simple as a question (‘do you want to [insert appropriate words]?’) or a brief phrase or request (‘spank me!’).

Dreaming about a raunchy, oily intimate massage followed by sexy good times?

You could say, ‘want to give each other a hot massage and then slide right into me?’
We guarantee your clothes will fly off quick!

But ensure you choose the right body oil, like the Coconu Hemp Infused Body Oil (psst: it’s sex toy friendly!)

7. Don’t Over Analyze

Good dirty talk doesn’t have to be creative, just honest.
So try not to overthink what you’re going to say.

Share what’s on your mind and how your partner makes you feel during sex.

Whether you’re a woman or a man, chances are, you don’t want silent sex. So let loose and allow the dirty words to flow!

 Read More: Yes, you can use Hemp Oil as Lube! Discover how this incredible ingredient can take your bedroom activities to new levels of pleasure.

8. Dial Up Some Hotline Bling (i.e., Phone Sex)

Dirty talk doesn’t have to be exclusively for the bedroom.

Amp up your sex life with some good dirty talk over the phone.

For instance, send your S.O. or boyfriend a dirty text message in the middle of work that’ll have them weak in the knees. Just make sure you’re sending it to the right person!

Wondering what to say in your naughty text message?

Here are a few phone sex dirty talk examples:
  • When you get home, I’ll be wearing ___________
  • I love it when we try [insert sex position]
  • I want to rip your clothes off the moment I see you!
  • Just hearing your voice makes me want to touch myself
  • Do you want to have FaceTime phone sex?

9. It’s In The Details

How do you explain what’s on your mind so vividly that it feels real in the moment?

As a part of foreplay, you can describe everything you plan to do to your partner — down to the minute details.

This can include where you’d take them, how you’d undress them, what sex position you’ll try with them and more.

Sexologist Megan Stubbs, EdD, reveals that talking dirty makes the activity a complete mind and body experience. So engage all the senses with your dirty descriptions, such as how your S.O. smells, tastes, sounds, and feels.

A couple cuddling in bed


10. Get In External Stimulation

Take matters further by watching an adult movie or reading an erotic novel together!

Here’s the tea: Women and men get aroused differently.

A woman takes time to feel aroused. She often finds stimulation through imagery, so descriptive erotic books work well to amp up the heat.

While you read, you can even indulge in a little extra fun with the help of personal lube. We love the Coconu Water Based Personal Lubricant for its silky, smooth feel.



On the other hand, a man is usually aroused visually. So an adult movie might do the trick pretty quickly!

11. Sexy Role Play, Anyone?

If you want to advance your dirty talk sessions (and reduce potential awks), consider adding character role play to your arsenal.

What’s that?
Character role play is where you both act out your deepest desires (think: Ross’ fantasy about Princess Leia in her gold bikini!)

It can help you step outside your comfort zone while building great sexual tension.

After all, anything dirty uttered can be easily blamed on the character you’re portraying!

 Read More: We’ve got 10 Must-Read Sexy Tips To Help You Talk About Sex!

Dirty Things To Say During Sex: A Beginner’s Guide

Now that you understand how to talk dirty, let’s dive into some specific bad words or phrases you can use.

Ready to take your relationship to new levels?
Check out this quick reference guide of dirty things to say during sexual acts:

Set The Mood:

  • I want you to undress me
  • I want to taste you
  • I'm so wet/hard right now

In the Moment:

  • Just like that
  • Talk to me
  • Don’t stop

Got All The Feels:

  • You feel incredible inside me
  • I love your body
  • I love that thing you do with your [insert body part]

One Word, Please:

  • Faster!
  • Harder!
  • Deeper!

As you continue your dirty talking journey, remember to add new things (especially dirty talk phrases) to keep your relationship fresh and exciting!

Baby, Talk Dirty To Me!

Whether you're talking IRL or sending a dirty text message, the more practice you have talking dirty, the better you become.

Plus, the more comfortable you feel with yourself and your partner, the easier it is to sex talk. And with our dirty talk examples and tips, there's no stopping you!

While you're working on perfecting your sexy talk, turn up the heat with the Coconu Lubricant range. Let the good times roll!