How Sex Lube Can Help You Have Better Intimacy

Do you want to use sex lube to spice things up in the bedroom? Or just to alleviate vaginal dryness during sex or masturbation?

If worry or mortification is on your mind, rest assured, you’re not alone. Sex lube can help make any sexual activity instantly more pleasurable. 

A good lubricant can minimize friction between your skin and your partner, a body part, or even an object. Using a sex lube can also get rid of pain, uncomfortable rubbing, and chaffing.

So, how do you find the best lube?

We get it. Finding the right lubricant can be distressing and confusing. This article will cover why you should use a sex lube, the different types available, what ingredients to watch out for, and the best products to try

Let’s jump in!

The Article Will Cover:

Why Should You Use Sex Lube?

Why use sex lube

When it comes to intimacy, a good note-to-self is the wetter you are, the more enjoyable the experience irrespective of whether you’re indulging in penetrative sex or masturbation, with or without a sex toy.

For some women, this is easier said than done, especially if the body isn’t producing sufficient natural lubrication. So, how do you navigate past this?

Enter personal lubricant or sex lube. 

The right lubricant can enhance sexual pleasure, boost arousal and keep your vagina hydrated and soft. 

If you experience discomfort during sex, this is not unusual. The good news is that there’s a way around this irritation, thanks to personal lubricants. According to an Indiana University study, 70% of the women surveyed shared that using lube made their sexual experiences more enjoyable and pleasurable.  

What's more, you don’t have to feel any embarrassment about using a lubricant. After all, it can be the greatest addition to your nooky arsenal. 

Even women who naturally produce large quantities of vaginal fluid still use a lubricant to heighten their sex life.

Here are some more benefits of using sex lube for all types of play.

1. Smoother skin and less friction

This may be a less obvious benefit, however using sex lube helps give you smoother skin and less friction, particularly for sensitive skin. Imagine not having to worry about chafing and skin bumps, as well as internal friction! What this means is you’ll get to experience better sex without irritation.

2. Vaginal dryness begone!

Having amazing sex at any age is important, and sometimes you just need a little help. Nearly 50% of post-menopausal women report they developed symptoms around vaginal atrophy, a 2010 study reveals. Vaginal atrophy, a.k.a atrophic vaginitis, is when the vaginal tissues start deteriorating because of a loss of estrogen. 

When the body has low estrogen levels, the vaginal tissues become less flexible and thinner. They also get less blood flow and generate less natural vaginal fluids. As a result, expect vaginal dryness, irritation, and pain during sex. 

Some other causes of vaginal dryness are:

  • Insufficient water intake or if you’re usually dehydrated
  • Use of hormonal birth control
  • Sjogren’s syndrome (It’s an autoimmune disorder that attacks the glands that produce moisture)
  • Douching (washing out the vagina)
  • Insufficient foreplay before sex
  • Breastfeeding (breastfeeding ties into your body producing less estrogen leading to vaginal dryness)
  • Medications for colds or allergies
  • Some antidepressants 
  • Anxiety and stress

Using a suitable lube can help decrease any discomfort and allow you to enjoy sex again fully. 

A vaginal moisturizer is a little different from a sex lube, but it is exclusively used to ease dryness. 

It works differently because a vaginal moisturizer gets absorbed by the skin, unlike lube. And you need to use it regularly to alleviate dryness.   

3. Greater confidence and enhanced pleasure

We know that feeling sexy under the sheets can be tough. In the boardroom, you exude confidence, but when it comes to sex, it’s a whole other ballgame. 

You can amp up the sex factor in many ways, but one method we particularly love is dabbing a little lubricant down there to help you feel sexier. Bonus points if it’s an oil-based lube that doubles as a body oil to extend the steaminess to the rest of your body! 

Couple the lubricant with your favorite lingerie, and you’re ready for a fantastic time in the bedroom, irrespective of it being self-love sessions or with your significant other.

What Are Some of the More Natural Lubes? 

Natural sex lubes

Your body organically produces many fluids that act as lubrication. These primarily depend on where you are in your menstrual cycle. 

Let’s break it down:

Cervical Fluid

You may have noticed that around the time of your ovulation, you’re more lubricated than usual.

Your cervical fluid acts as a natural lubricant if you’re in the mood for some slip-and-slide. Chances are you may also feel more aroused closer to ovulation. 

Do remember that unprotected sex during this time has a higher chance of resulting in pregnancy.

Vaginal Fluid

Vaginal or arousal fluid comes from within your vagina. It’s a part of the body’s sexual response cycle, and it’s a personal lubricant that’s available all the time. You just need sufficient foreplay and enough time to get aroused so you can produce adequate “wetness”.


Using your saliva, one of your body’s natural lubricants, during a little solo TLC, may protect against developing vulvovaginal candida, i.e., vulval and vaginal symptoms caused by a type of yeast. This may be because of antifungal properties and protective bacteria present in saliva, together with an inadequate immune response against your fluids.

However, a word of caution: if you receive oral sex from someone, it may increase your chances of contracting vulvovaginal candida. 

How Do You Choose A Sex Lube?

How to select a sex lube

You must pick the right sex lube based on personal preference, type of play involved, and any known allergies.

Why is this important?

Doing this will help you make educated decisions about what goes into your body and, ultimately, lead to fantastic sex. 

There are four types of lube — water based, silicone based, oil based, and hybrid lubes.

Let’s explore the different types of lube:

1. Water-based lube

If you’re just starting, this is the best type of lubricant to use. Water-based sex lubes are water-soluble and may have added ingredients for moisture retention, resistance to contamination, and even dispersal. 

These lubricants come in two varieties: one with glycerin and another without glycerin. If the lube in question contains no glycerin, you are less likely to have vaginal irritation. Plus, they can be kept for a much more extended period. 

Water-based lubes absorb into the skin and dissipates and, as a result, tend to dry you out. But, if you reapply the lubricant or use water or saliva, it revives them. Plus, this lube washes out easily from clothes and bedsheets!

This type of personal lubricant is great for masturbation, sex toy play, and penetrative sex. You can also use this with condoms, so it also works great for protected anal sex as the condom will not slip out. 

Water-based lubricants are also perfect for women with vaginal discomfort or sensitive skin. 

2. Silicone based lube

Silicone lube doesn’t contain any water. Since the body doesn’t absorb silicone, it lasts longer than its water-based counterpart. 

Silicone lube is glossier and of a thicker consistency than a water based lubricant. Plus, it doesn’t absorb as easily into your skin. 

Ideal for longer-lasting sessions, silicone based lube requires less reapplication. The downside? Silicone is a little harder to wash off (so watch the sheets!). You’ll need to put in some effort to scrub it off with soap to remove residue. 

Do also be mindful about spilling silicone based lubricant on floors that are hardwood — not only will it stain, but it will be a little slippery for some months.

Want to hop in the bath or shower for a steamy sesh? Silicone lube is the way to go as it will stay put in water. 

This type of personal lubricant should not be used with a silicone sex toy as it can degrade the toy’s surface. This also applies to all other products made with silicone. However, you can use silicone lube with condoms.

If you have your heart fixed on using silicone lubricant with a toy, you can opt for ones made from hard materials such as glass, aluminum, hard plastic, ceramic, marble, or steel. 

3. Oil based lube

The gift that keeps on giving, oil based lube is suitable for all long-lasting play, including water play, unprotected penetrative sex, oral sex, and masturbation. You can also use this type of personal lubricant for an intimate massage. Like the silicone based ones, the oil version is tough to clean too.

Oil based lubricant has plant-based oils like coconut oil, sweet almond oil, or sunflower oil. So some lubricants can increase the chances of slipping or breakage when using condoms. They dissolve the latex found in condoms, diaphragms, and sex toys.

So, if you’re in a relationship that doesn’t require using a condom, oil-based lubes are a fantastic choice. You can also avoid certain preservatives and other additives present in other lubricants. 

Remember: Before diving headfirst into the lube of your choice (i.e., water, silicone, or oil lubes), always do a patch test for a reaction before applying them to more sensitive areas.

Want to discover more about coconut oil? Read through Coconut Oil As a Lube: Is It Safe? What Is The Alternative?

4. Hybrid Lube

Although not typically listed among the types of lube available, a hybrid lube is a personal lubricant with a mix of water-based lubes and silicone ones. 

In terms of texture and consistency, they are not as thick as silicone lubes. They are also not waterproof, like silicone lubes. 

It is also not recommended to use your silicone sex toys with hybrid lubes without first doing a spot test.

Want more information on the types of lubes? Read Everything You Need To Know About Different Types of Lube for more. 

Things to avoid in a lube

As with any product, you must do your research and check the ingredient list on a commercial lubricant packaging. This will help you avoid possible infections, allergic reactions, and tingling sensations from warming lubes that may not be very comfortable for you. 

Here’s a quick run-through of what you need to keep in mind:

  • Check the pH level of the lube. A healthy vagina should have a pH level of 3.5 to 4.5. Pick a lubricant that fits these numbers.
  • Steer clear of artificially flavored lube, including artificial colors, sugars, oils, or additives. This includes propylene glycol, nonoxynol-9, and chlorhexidine gluconate. Since you don’t know how your body will react to features with tingling properties, it is best to avoid them. Remember, if the product contains a high amount of glycerin, you may experience adverse effects around the anal and vaginal tissues.
  • Find a product that’s free of paraben, petroleum jelly, glycerin, mineral oil, and baby oil. It will help minimize your risk of catching a yeast infection, bacterial vaginosis, or sexually transmitted infection (STI). 
  • Some lubricants have “fertile friendly” or “sperm-friendly” on the packaging if you’re trying to get pregnant. Some lubes harm sperm motility. 

Learn more about your lube with Does Lube Expire? How To Tell If Your Sex Lubricant Is Old 

How Do You Use Sex Lube?

How to use sex lube

Lube is great for any type of play, and there really isn’t a ‘right’ way to use it. But here are some hacks to help you get going. 

Use liberally and wherever you need it

There’s no need to hold back on the amount you use. Apply however much lube you feel you need. From masturbation to sex toy play to vaginal and anal sex, you can use lube in varying amounts as you please. Apply it wherever you think you’ll require it. You can use it during anal sex, on the penis, or vagina. 

Apply sex lube cold or warm

Straight off the tube or bottle, sex lube can be cold to touch, and this can work for all your sexual activities. However, you can also warm the product between your hands before application. It’s not necessary, but it can help amp things up!

Try it during oral play

During cunnilingus, you may have a dry mouth that can make giving and receiving oral sex uncomfortable. A little application of lube can help both parties feel a little happier. 

Spread it on before foreplay

Dab a little sexual lubricant onto your clitoris and vulva ahead of dry humping or any other form of foreplay. It’ll help spice up the pleasure factor!

Use it during a massage

If you choose an oil-based lube, warm the product between your hands and proceed to give your partner a sensual massage. 

Add it to the inside of a condom

A common complaint among men is that a condom reduces sensation. A great way to use protection while enhancing feeling is to add a wee bit of lube into the condom before unrolling and sliding it on. Just make sure you’re using a water-based lube if the condom is latex!

Now that you know what to use sex lube for, let’s explore the best range of personal lubricants!

The Coconu Range of Lubes

Coconu range of sex lubes

Coconu has two personal lubricants — a water based lube and an oil based lube — that can ease you into a comfortable, sexy experience. Additionally, the brand also has one other product — a hemp body oil — that’s mainly body oil but also functions as a lube.   

1. Coconu Water Based Personal Lubricant

Glide into a playful session with this water-based lube. Coconu uses all-natural ingredients with no genetically modified organisms, alcohol, phytates, parabens, petroleum, gluten, dyes, and fragrances. So you don’t have to fret about harmful additives in your lube.

What’s more? 

This organic lube is hypoallergenic and preserves your vagina’s pH balance, so you can go all out worry-free during your intimate moments, from masturbation to vaginal sex to anal intercourse.

Rediscover incredible silkiness with this lube that serves as a moisturizer to rehydrate any sensitive tissues. Yes, you can use this product to add in a little moisture at any time!

Made with Organic Coconut Water, Cellulose Gum Cyamopsis Tetragonoloba (Guar) Gum, Xanthan Gum, Sodium Benzoate, and Potassium Sorbate, this Coconu water based lubricant is great for use with latex condoms or silicone toys.

Price: $24.99 for 3 fl oz 

2. Coconu Oil Based Personal Lubricant

It’s time for stimulating (and undeniably satisfying) sex with this oil-based formula! Like its sister water-based lube, this Coconu product uses 100% organic ingredients and is free from any harmful additives.

The Coconu Oil-Based Lube is also one of the only products in the market that’s USDA-certified organic.

You can use this with polyurethane condoms, but not anything with latex. It works wonderfully well as a massage oil if you and your partner are looking for a little warm-up ahead of any sexual activities. 

And, don’t worry. You can use this lube on both the vagina and anus without being anxious about infections. 

Awaken your senses with this blend of natural ingredients and oils, including Cocoa Seed Butter, Beeswax, Shea Butter, Sunflower Seed Oil, Coconut Oil, Sweet Almond Oil, Kukui Seed Oil, and Sea Buckthorn Oil. 

All the Coconu sex lubes stimulate natural lubrication, so you can truly enjoy your time alone or with your partner. 

Price: $24.99 for 3 fl oz

3. Hemp Infused Body Oil

This triple threat can be used on your body before, during, and after any play. Combined with coconut oil and hemp, you can apply this product as a pre-lube, massage or body oil, and personal lubricant all in one. 

It’s made with hemp that contains no THC levels, so you can enjoy the benefits of a massage without getting high. 

Thanks to other ingredients like Beeswax, Cocoa Seed Butter, Sunflower Seed Oil, Sweet Almond Oil, Coconut Oil, and Shea Butter, rest assured you will be well lubricated. 

Just like Coconu’s other fantastic line of products, this body oil is edible, natural, vegan-friendly, cruelty-free, and completely hypoallergenic. Plus, they are sustainable, plastic-free, and made in the US from sugar cane.

The Hemp Infused Body Oil absorbs fast and reduces friction. It also eases pain, inflammation, and soreness while encouraging stimulation. A win-win in our book!

Price: $34.99 for 3 fl oz

Want more options for anal sex? This article on The Five Best Anal Lubes for 2023 (With Features & Pricing) might be just what you need!

Experience Heightened Pleasure 

A fun and pleasurable time in the sack all boils down to a state of mind. With the Coconu range of organic personal sex lubes, you can take the worry out and focus on what’s really important — exploring your sensual side with yourself and your partner. 

Remember, if you have painful sex regularly, even with lubrication — particularly vaginal sex, it may be sensible to consult a doctor. 

Choosing the right lube doesn’t have to be a daunting task. Coconu helps remove any feelings of intimidation when picking out the right lube with a fun, easy-to-understand range of products. 

Are you prepared to level up your bedroom game?

Get a tube for yourself and explore your passionate side!